Carlos (tallon29) wrote,

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So, I'm sitting here, paying my bills online and working (something I'll probably be doing constantly for the weekend... working, that is) Hopefully I can get everything done on Saturday and not have to kill myself on Sunday. I need a break.

I'm genuinely happy at this point in my life. It's a wonderful feeling. Apart from the stress at work which I enjoy in a twisted sort of way, Things are great. I've had some great conversations with friends lately... some just entertaining, some thought-provoking, and some very inspiring. I haven't really had any time in at least a week for myself (meaning, as silly as it sounds, conversations with myself) but hopefully I get get some quality introspective time this weekend. I've got a sizeable amount of topics queued up and waiting to go... just need the time to give them. If a massive post suddenly shows up in my LJ this weekend without warning, you'll know that I've had some time to myself. Don't worry, I'll use LJ cut.

And what's odd, is, for the first time in my life, I'd almost rather not have time to myself. I'm beginning to realize that going it alone may not be as easy as it had seemed (I had hoped). I suppose we'll just have to see. I can be as strong as is required, that just doesn't necessarily mean I'll enjoy it. Oy, I'm really ready to go right now. I could type for a solid hour at this point and not touch on half of what's on my mind, but I really need to work so that I can sleep tonight. I'm so tired, I really need to sleep. I don't think I'll make it to lunch tomorrow.

My direct deposit just hit from work for the past two weeks. Dan's buying my geforce 4, and also some other components he needs for another PC, so I'm going to go ahead and place the order for the big components of my next PC. I'm still unsure of a few things, but it'll be settled by tomorrow. One thing is definite, though.... Powercolor ATI 9700 Pro from newegg. Hope it'll help my framerates in N2003, which I just picked up two days ago along with Road to Rome. I haven't been playing games NEARLY as much lately. There are several reasons for this, a large one being work.------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ah, I nodded off with my finger on the hyphen key. Just woke back up. I'm so desperately tired, but I REALLY need to finish this project for work. I can't wait until it's over with. I'm soo soo tired. I wonder if a large part of it has to do with all these streams of thought I'm having to keep at bay. If I stop and do nothing for just a second, one of them pokes through and I get distracted. Must maintain focus tomorrow, or I'll be in some deep crap this weekend.

On top of everything else, I'm on my way to being sick. The operations manager at my work and I share an office. Well he came in yesterday with a huge fever, runny nose, sore throat, sneezing... you name it. He stayed home today, but it's too late. I've got it. That's all I need is to get sick with everything else on my plate.

I did well at softball tonight. I was nervous because my Dad was there and struck out my first at bat .... in softball .... but the next two at-bats I hit two solid shots, so I redeemed myself. My Dad .... oy, I was getting off on a tangent there. See? Stop typing for one second and some stream/train of thought just jumps forward and demands attention. I will have to sit and write a fair amount this weekend. Maybe I'll even post it this time, instead of just deleting it like I sometimes do. We'll see.

It's been years and years since I've been this content, and yet I'm al... ah, interrupted with good news. Congratulations, Fabrice. Maybe someday I'll do the same. Maybe. I'm more open to the possibility now than I've ever been before.

More to come, either tomorrow or over the weekend. Hope everyone is having a wonderful night's sleep. I don't know how much longer I can remain coherent.
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